so i've only been licensed about four months and i finally worked up the nerve to check in to our local Tuesday night net. went okay i think but at one point i asked the net control if i could ask a general question and he said go ahead, and i asked something about... honestly it was kind of off topic for the net and you could just tell by the pause that it was the wrong time for it. nobody was rude or anything but i felt embarrassed after.

i guess my question is how do you know what's appropriate to bring up on a net vs just waiting to ragchew with someone after? like is there some unwritten rulebook i'm missing or do you just pick it up over time. i've been listening to the net for a few weeks before i checked in and thought i had a feel for it but apparently not totally. also is it normal to feel this nervous about transmitting, even on a local repeater? im still kind of shaky every time i key up

oh man don't sweat it, everyone has that moment. i remember my first net check-in i accidentally said my call sign wrong and then tried to correct it and made it worse somehow. net control just moved on like it didnt happen and afterwards a guy came back to me on the repeater and we talked for like 20 minutes, ended up being a really good contact.

the general thing with most traffic nets or formal nets is they have a pretty specific agenda and the net control is trying to keep things moving, so off-topic stuff is better saved for after the net closes or just on the repeater during normal times. but a lot of the more casual club nets are pretty relaxed and people do go off on tangents all the time. you kind of just have to read the room, or i guess read the air. after a few more check-ins you'll get a feel for how formal that particular net is. some nets the NCS runs a tight ship, others it's basically just organized chatting. the nervousness does go away, mostly, i still get a little flutter when i call cq on HF which i've been doing for years so maybe not completely lol

honestly same boat here, been licensed about 8 months and nets still make me a little anxious. what helped me was just listening to a lot of different nets before jumping in, which sounds like you already did. also writing down what i was going to say before keying up. feels silly but it helps.