so ive been licensed for about 4 months now and every time i get on HF someone is using phonetics for everything, like even when the band is totally clear and there's no QRM at all. my elmer told me it's just convention but i looked it up and it seems like some people treat it like a rule. is it actually required or is it just something people do out of habit? also i keep messing up and saying things like "D for Dog" instead of Delta which i know is wrong but it just comes out that way. does anyone actually care about that on air or will people just think im a newly licensed idiot

It's not a rule, at least not in the US for normal amateur operation. The FCC doesn't mandate NATO phonetics, they just require that you identify with your callsign. How you spell it out is up to you. That said there's a reason the NATO alphabet became standard — it was specifically designed so each word sounds distinct even through heavy noise and distortion, like Alpha and Bravo don't get confused the way A and B might over a crackly path.

The "D for Dog" thing is old phonetics, that was actually the US military standard before NATO replaced it in the 50s. You'll occasionally hear old timers use Dog or Easy or Fox and nobody's going to key up and correct you mid-QSO. But if you're trying to get a callsign across on a pile-up or a weak signal, Delta is going to serve you a lot better than Dog just because more people will recognize it instantly without thinking.

Don't stress about it too much. The point is to be understood. If someone can't copy your call and you spell it out clearly, mission accomplished regardless of which phonetics you used.

yeah honestly i wouldnt worry about it. ive been doing this for like 2 years and i still sometimes say november instead of... wait no november is right. anyway i sometimes mix up the ones that sound similar when im nervous on a new band. nobody has ever said anything to me. just practice saying them out loud when youre not on air, like just repeat your callsign phonetically to yourself a few times before you key up and eventually it becomes automatic